1) I have minimal patience when I am tired, hungry and/or cranky. Although I can compose myself and remain polite... I HAVE NO TOLERANCE FOR IDIOT SERVERS who think they're cute by being "funny"... or who think they are flirting with you by delaying the process of receiving your desired food product. Secretly I wish for you to crawl into a cave and be eaten by bears who have woken up from hibernation.
Scenario A: At timmie's in the morning needing a quick pick me since I am exhausted out of my senses (which are generally required on the job) and in a rush to get on the unit on time for shift change
Me: Can I have a Medium Regular
Cash: Sorry we're out of coffee, it'll be a 15 min wait
M: Seriously?
C: Sorry, Can I offer you some tea?
M: Ok, I'll have a med green tea
C: Sorry out of that too
M: (wtfrig, u gotta be kidding me) Ummm OK, early grey then
C: All we have is peppermint
M: Seriously? then WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
C: Just jokkkinnngg, you wanted a coffee right?
Scenario B: At subway, getting my toppings on my sub. Famished, starved....I haven't had anything to eat since my bowl of cereal and just pulled a hectic 12 hr shift.
Me: I'll have everything except for pickles
Boy: Everything?
Me: except for the pickles
Boy: You want this? (points to EACH TOPPING, as I nod yes and go through each topping with a fake smile as he is trying to be funny)
Me: Can I have a lot of onions please?
Boy: Is this enough? (Essentially grabbing all the contents in the tin in his plastic covered hand)
Me: No, not that much .. (With a weak laugh)
Boy: This much? (Drops all the onions and grabs a pinch)
Me: Haha. no a little more (you stupid idiot, i hate you so much right now)
CUT THE CRAP AND JUST GIVE ME MY FREAKINNN FOOD!
1b) I love food. Consumption of food is NEVER A JOKING MATTER.
2)I find it absolutely refreshing to have a good, I mean GOOD, ddong. In other words, laying a deuce, #2, passing stool, clearing your bowels... good old poo. Without exertion or use of the valsalva maneuver, the ease of perfect passage. ANNND its THAT much better when there is minimal scent associated with the act.... so that you don't have to worry about the next person who's going to go into the washroom after you. Complete satisfaction.
3) When I check out men in public, after the initial assessment of face and clothes.... my eyes IMMEDIATELY go to their shoes. Why? I don't know. I don't even have a shoe fetish like many girls do. Don't get me wrong, I love pretty shoes... but probably own about 5 that I actually wear. For some reason it is a complete turn off when I see men in track-running shoes as everyday wear shoes.... when the laces are so tightly criss-crossed that the tip of the shoe begins to curl up.... or when your shoes look like you they have been sitting in a bucket of mud and its obvious you are NOT a labour worker.....*shudder* One of my weird superficial and shallow confessions.
4) I have a salt tooth. As many people have a sugar tooth and crave sweets and chocolate, I crave salty foods. I'll try to avoid the craving because they are usually associated with foods in the genre of JUNK... but once I have a craving, no food can fill the void and hence I binge and over eat on other foods that are not as satisfying... and end up consuming more fats and calories than the intial craving. It is quite upsetting and pathetic.
5) I get pleasure from cleaning and organizing. When I am stressed or upset, my favourite past time is to clean, tidy and reorganize my room. It feels soooo good to see a clean room.... to open my drawers and closet and see my clothes neatly folded (in a specific pattern for different types of clothes and placed in a specific direction) and hung (all facing a the same direction - face to the right - and particular order). It irritates me when you mess the order up. People have tested it and have felt my wrath.
... just sayin'
